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sábado, 26 de junho de 2021

Chap. 6 - Louis and Her

 6.

January 5th, Monday

I arrived at the office before everyone else, at least I thought I would arrive before everyone else. Their time is 9am, it's still eight twenty. I go to my desk, put my backpack on the floor and my computer on the table, take off my suit and go to the pantry to get a coffee. I'm in a good mood and I have two certainties: 1) this project in Recife will be a success 2) Ana will be mine.

As soon as I open the pantry door, there she was, with her friend Luana. They are sitting at the last table chatting and having coffee quietly, laughing. Not even noticing my entrance, but as soon as the machine starts to make the coffee noise they both look in my direction, I smile at them and shake my head in greeting. Luana gives me a wide smile and looks me up and down, I'll tell you that I was even a little embarrassed .Ana joins her full lips in a contained smile and raises her right hand saying "hi" and turns to her friend again .

If I was decided before, now even more! She blushed just looking at me. I definitely have a chance! Unless they were already talking about me, that would be a problem. I take the coffee from the machine and lean against the sink that is right next to it, putting one hand in my pocket and with my right hand bringing the cup to my mouth. I keep watching the two of them, not making a point of hiding it, it's just the three of us here. Luana then pushes her chair back and I see Ana trying to grab the hem of her friend's shirt, who is already standing and coming towards me.

For a moment I thought she's going to talk to me, but she stops in front of the machine and presses the button for a coffee. She takes it out of the machine and orders another one while she fills a bottle with water. When it’s ready she looks at me and asks:

- Can you help me?

I look at her who has a cup of coffee in one hand and the bottle of water in the other, and at the machine with the other coffee ready.

- Of course!

I grab the cup from the machine and follow her to the table she was sitting at. Ana looks mad at her friend, and once again her cheeks are flushed. I try to hold back my smile, but I'm not sure if I made it.

- Good morning Ana. Is this yours?

- Yes it is, thank you sir.

- You're welcome. Do you need anything else Luana?

- Not for the time being!

- And how were the holiday?

- Very well, thank you.

- And you Ana? I turned to face her so I could look directly into her eyes.

- Well too, thanks.

- That's good! - My cell phone trembles in my pocket and I excuse myself for both.

Richard: Where are you?

Louis: In the pantry.

Richard: Get me some coffee, I'm on my way.

Louis: Okay.

I take a deep breath and put the phone back in my pocket.

- See you later, girls.

- Thank you sir.

I go to the machine and as soon as I select the coffee Richard opens the door in a hurry:

- Louis, you won't believe it!

- Good morning Richard.

He looks at the girls, shakes his head and comes back to me speaking in a lower voice:

- Did I get in the way?

- A little bit...

- My bad!

- What you want?

- Grab the coffee and follow me!

He sat in the chair in front of my desk and said:

- Are you really going to try?

- I already said yes!

- I'll put your name on the bet!

- Come on Richard! What do you want?

- Next month is Duda's birthday.

- And?

- I was thinking of taking her on a trip this year!

- Nice! Where?

- So, only four days, I don't know. We're leaving on Wednesday night and coming back on Sunday.

- That’s nice…

- You need to help me!

- I'll think and I'll tell you.

He got up and left talking to himself all in love. I was happy for both of them and I remembered when he told me he was going out with Duda.

***

- Richard, let's go out today at eleven!

- I don't want to go out today!

- It's Friday and I don't want to go out with JP alone again. In two minutes he's flirting a tail and I'm alone.

- Go find one for yourself!

I looked at him sitting on the couch, from that house that still had a bunch of boxes to unpack because I had just moved. Only the sofa and my bed were habitable.

- How about you? I noticed that you haven't dated anyone these last five months!

- I'm good.

It was still eight o'clock and he came here to my house with me almost every day, but mostly on weekends, afraid I'd do some shit and go after my ex.

- Do you want to drink something?

- A beer...

When I was near at the kitchen counter he picks up his cell phone with an incoming message, looks at the message and smiles quickly replying with nimble fingers. There is a woman in this story!

- Hey Richard?

- Hey? – He asked laughing and looked up at me.

- I'll get a beer and you'll go out with me or I'll pour some whiskey and you'll tell who this woman is?

His smile ended and his green eyes widened, he straightened his body on the sofa and rested his forearms on his knees, took a deep breath and said:

- It's about time! A whiskey!

I returned the beers into the fridge and took two glasses from a box beside it, added some ice and took it to the living room, he was already holding the whiskey bottle that was in another box with the other drinks next to the television, on the floor. He filled half the glasses and toasted me. He took a big gulp, almost the same as the day I needed the courage to tell him about the nightmare called Paula.

- Louis, here's the thing...

I stared at him calmly, not asking anything, and took a small sip of my drink.

- There is a woman! And this time I feel like she's not just anyone!

- Oh yes! Do I know her?

- Yes you do!

He took another sip of his drink, encouraging me to do the same. And once again I was just waiting, all anxious for the name of that person.

- So...

- Are you going to tell me or not?

His cell phone lit up again with a new message which he quickly replied and soon received the message. He was discussing something by message with that person. He answers the last time and throws his cell phone on the couch. My phone then starts ringing. 

- Hi sister. How are you?

- Hi Lu. Is Richard with you?

- Yes he is!

- Okay...

- Why, do you want to talk to him?

- No! With yourself! Just to say that I love you a lot, okay?

- Okay...

- All right then. I'm at Mom's house if you need to talk to me.

"Let me talk to her?"

- Duda, wait a minute, Richard wants to talk to you!

I handed the phone to him, I kept looking and paying attention to the conversation:

“Duda / I have / If you want to come / Ok / Bye, kiss”

He gave me back the phone and before turning off the cell phone that was still lit in my hand, he spoke quickly:

- I'm seeing Duda!

- What are you talking about Richard?

- The woman... It's Duda!

- You’re fucking kidding with me, right?!

He watched me without looking away from me. I took another sip of the drink that was in my hand and continued lifting the cell phone and placing it in front of his face with my arm outstretched:

- Duda? My sister? Mary Eduarda?

- Yes!

I stepped on top of him and I think he thought I was going to hit him right then, because he raised his arms to protect his face, but I just wanted to get his cell phone that was lying on the couch on the other side of his body.

- Unlock this shit!

He unlocked and returned the device that was still open in the last messages:

Duda: Today you will stay with me, right?

Richard: I'm with Louis.

Duda: But I miss you!

Richard: Me too. But I need to talk to him.

Duda: He's already quite big! Today you stay with me! You had promised!

Richard: It's not that! I'll talk about us!

Duda: Are you sure?

Richard: He is my best friend!

Duda: He's my older brother!

Richard: Will he want to kill me, doesn’t he?

Duda: Probably! Wait a little longer!

Richard: No! I'll talk to him right now, bye. Kiss.

I stared at him, with an empty glass already in hand. I got up, walked around it, picked up the bottle again, and refilled our glasses. We both turned the golden liquid inside, already without any ice, and after many minutes I said:

- My sister? And now, who the fuck goes with me to the club?

- With me yet!

- And she. What the fuck Richard!

- Everything is fine?

- For now it is. But if something happens to her you already know what will happen to you!

He leaned against the sofa laughing and replied:

- I know. I will become "little girl"

- That's it! Sorry bro, but these are the rules!

- And what would be the form of torture with me?

- I'll still think about the worst one!

- Louis? - I looked at him who continued: - I like her!

- That's good! It's all I need to know.

I kicked him out of my house after an hour or so to go meet Duda and they find a way to tell the whole family this weekend. That day I discovered that life goes on. I still had a way and my life was going to get back on track.

I was pissed off and dying of jealousy, not Dudas, but for not having him around every day. I was in deep shit, disillusioned and fucked up. But somehow seeing their happiness helped me, and little by little I accepted it.

***

I looked straight ahead and they were all in the office, talking about the holidays, and calmly the pace began to return to normal.

Byarn called me to let me know that in June I should have the team ready for the new project so I sat at that desk and worked late for almost every day in January, to make the perfect scope of work, without any flaws. .

I still hadn't talked to anyone about Recife, but certainly the gossip had already covered the four corners of the office. I got more and more grumpy every day, either because of the topics I had to change almost every day, making me work harder, or because of sleepless nights dreaming the most absurd things with my employee, or because of my inability to think about how I could get to her in a subtle way.

How will I know if I have a chance if with each passing day I'm more trapped inside my bubble, fighting with someone who does something wrong or arguing with someone on the phone. I think this shit on this project is killing my brains!


February 14th, Saturday

- Come on Louis, otherwise we'll get too much traffic!

- Calm down JP!

Anyway, carnival. For a change we would go to Guarujá, just the four of us because my parents don't like to stay there during this time of year, they say it's too messy for them. I think so too, but I couldn't get rid of the three by pissing off!

- Richard and Duda are already in the car!

I grabbed a bag, with some beach clothes, and headed downstairs. My house was already looking like a house! I have placed beside the kitchen counter in a large space between the stairs leading to the bedrooms a pool table, two electronic table games, a pinball table, a dartboard, a smaller round table for playing cards and a refrigerator at the bar, so they were always here at home without having to go out for fun or drinking.

The house was a little dark, with steel appliances, gray and blue walls, dark marble, dark wood, beaten floors, and industrial lights. All very modern and no frills.

- Let's go!

- Hey, how about that girl?

- Nothing yet!

- Geez Louis, you are too slow! Two months already!

- So it is! – Two months.... It's been like four or five and it's killing me! At least that ridiculous bet is still running in the office which makes me very satisfied!

My cell phone starts ringing, it was Richard:

- We're arriving!

- Come the fuck soon!

I hear Duda's high-pitched voice in the background: "I'm going to kill you..."

JP and I went down the front stairs two at a time and Duda was holding Paula by the her hair while Richard was trying to hold his wife. JP stopped and laughed, after all our sister was doing the job.

- Come help JP!

I got closer and pulled Paula around the waist while JP separated Duda's hand, who had a wad of hair between her fingers, she turned and hugged me around the neck saying with her eyes full of tears:

- I’m sorry! I love you! I love you!

I let go of her waist at the same moment she took my face in both hands and said:

- You're the only person who understands me, aren't you?

Richard then takes her wrists and turns her to face him:

- Are you crazy?

- Me? That bitch that attacked me!

If it wasn't for JP to be holding Duda she would have grabbed Paula again, Richard released her wrists tightly when he heard those words directed no longer only my sister. Finally, I screamed, deep in my chest with all the oxygen and for all that time I hadn't said anything:

- NO!

They all looked at me and were silent, so I continued:

- You three, wait for me inside please!

- But… - Duda started and I just glared at her, but not for her. I turned to Paula, who was a little red in her arms, where Duda had squeezed and her hair was messed up:

- I don't understand and I don't want to understand! I do not want anything with you! I do not love you! I don't even like you! And you made me understand this in the worst possible way! Now I want you never to show up here again!

- I can't promise that! I love you!

- Lies!

- I feel like I'm losing you! I see in your eyes that there's another woman in your life and I can't let that happen!

- You are crazy!

- Will you lie to me and say you're not in love?

- No! I will not lie! I am completely in love with someone else! And that woman it’s not you!

- Who's the slut?

My blood boiled in such a way that I clenched my fists tightly beside her arm, I just opened her car door and motioned for her to get in, then kept talking:

- Tell me Louis. Who's the bitch you're having sex with?

Just as my hand reached up to grab her arm and force her body into the car, which wouldn't do any good, since I was unaware of my strength, Richard stepped in front of her and I grabbed his forearm as I instead of her thin arms.

- You leave now! - He said to her controlling the voice that got into the car still looking at me.

- You'll come back to me!

She said that and drove the car at high speed through the small streets of the condominium. I turned to Richard and saw that him arm had the imprint of my five fingers on it. Glad it wasn't hers!

- Sorry bro!

- That's nothing! She's going to be really sore from the kicks your sister gave her leg!

- Serious? – That made me laugh.

- And now?

- I don’t know. I don't want to travel!

- So let's not! How about we stay home?

- Will you stay here? For four days?

- Why not? There's a lot to do in there!

- Thank you!

- You're really in love, aren’t you?

- Why you are saying that?

- You just shouted those words to the four winds! We listened from inside. Now Duda knows!

- Shit! – I took a deep breath – Ok, but she doesn't need to know her name or where she works!

- Deal!

We spent the four days of carnival drinking and laughing indoors. With my head in Bob's World, thinking about Ana. When my head was in the clouds, they thought it was because of what happened on Saturday, so they didn't ask me anything. Better that way.

I already said that I was determined to talk to Ana, right? Now even more! I admitted out loud that I was in love, what the fuck could I do now? Did I get hurt?

Screw this!


April 30th, Thursday.

“From: Paula.monteiro@tch.com

To: Louis.nurs@tch.com; byarn.mol@tch.com

Subject: Recife

Louis good afternoon,

I need you to give me the names of those who will participate in the project until Monday, the 4th.

Thanks,

Paula Monteiro,

Human resources manager"


“From: Louis.nurs@tch.com

To: Paula.monteiro@tch.com; Byran.nurs@tch.com

Subject: Recife.

Paula, good afternoon.

One of the names is John Prado, you can talk to him whenever you want.

Att,

Louis Nurs,

Project Manager"


Tomorrow is a holiday and I was determined; I was going to take John with me! As for Ana, I was still in doubt, the problem is me, would I be able to not do any shit? But she's perfect for the project. I need all three, otherwise we won't be able to do the job!

I sat at home, looking again at her résumé, which I had already memorized, and opened my e-mail box to type a message to each of the three.

For John, Miguel and Ana, informing them what I wanted from each one. I just left it as a saved draft. Then I think straight about what to write. I had a great weekend with my family. It wasn't too hot or too cold so I rode my bike to my parents which makes me unwind and on Sunday night I was at home relaxed in my thoughts.

I got the computer and first started writing the email to Paula:


“From: Louis.nurs@tch.com

To: Paula.monteiro@tch.com; Byran.nurs@tch.com

Subject: important> Recife.

Paula, good night.

It's Ana Gusmão who goes with me! The person I'm completely in love with!

Att,

Louis G. Nurs,

Project Manager"


I laughed and deleted the email. Well I wanted to send! I started writing the e-mail for the three of them, it's going to be Ana! I've already said she's the best, so there's no reason not to be! But for some reason I mixed up all the conversations and sent the following message:


“From: Louis.nurs@tch.com

To: Ana.gusmao@tch.com

Subject: important> Ana Gusmão.

Paula, 

Can you talk to Ms. Gusmão tomorrow, still in the morning?

Att,

Louis G. Nurs,

Project Manager"


I pressed send and put the computer beside me on the couch, reach for the cup I was drinking and look at the screen again, then spit all the juice back into the cup, talking loudly:

- Fuck! I sent it to Ana instead of Paula. I have to cancel! I have to cancel!

I picked up the computer back in my lap and clicked cancel sending, but it was too late. She had already opened the email. Shit! I snapped all my fingers and my neck. I got up and walked around the room with my hands in my pockets wondering what I could do?

I reread the message and thought how strange it might sound, asking HR to speak to an employee of mine on the first business day of the month and still at the beginning of the day. It might look like I'm trying to fire her, which is definitely not the case. I'll have to call her!

I opened her résumé to confirm her cell phone number, it was correct and clicked on the photo to call. On the third ring she answered:

-Hello – I heard her sweet voice on the other end of the line, steady and strong.

- Good night, Miss. Gusmao. I know it's late and I apologize for intruding at this time on Sunday.

- No problem sir, I believe this call is due to the wrong e-mail you sent to me, right?!

Fuck, she's pretty straightforward! I was a little insecure and started to speak after pulling hard the air between my lungs:

- Er... Yes Ana, it's about the email.

- You can say sir, I know there was no time to cancel the e-mail.

I felt her voice a little scrambled, a little shaky, almost like when Duda is about to cry. Oh no! Do not Cry, please! So I continue to speak at once:

- Yes, again sorry. I see how my words could have been misinterpreted. I'll cut to the chase.

- I'm listening!

- The thing is, you're our best analyst and you have the best interpersonal results I've ever worked with, and I'm very happy to have you around always. I know you always gives a hand when a colleague is down, which I can't do.

- How sir?

- Oh Ana, come on! You know you're my right-hand man within the project!

- Am I?

- See how bad I am with people? Not even with the ones I like best I can show it.

- Damn you can not!

- What?

- Sorry sir!

At that time I started to laugh and put my hand over my mouth so she wouldn't listen, in vain!

- Are you laughing at me?

- Sorry Ana, but it was funny. I've never heard you cursing and at the team that's what the boys do the most You know I don't care.

- But I don't think it's appropriate.

- OK, no. It is not. But let me tell you one more secret, I curse too! – I said still laughing on the phone. And to my relief she started laughing too.

- Ana, I'm sorry to call at this time on Sunday, but it's been a great conversation.

- If it weren't for the mysterious subject that Miss Paula will have to talk to me tomorrow morning...

- Yes, that. Then. I asked her to talk to you about the possibility of training some employees at our new branch, which we will open in Recife in the second half of 2016. You must already know about this, right?

- About the branch, yes. But why do you need me?

- We need someone who knows the whole process and I know you're not afraid of work. What do you think?

- Hmm

- You don't need to give me an answer now, but by the end of the month, in June, I need confirmation or not, so we can schedule the first six months here, then another six months there.

- Six months?

- Yes. That's why I want you to think carefully. Tomorrow Paula will give you all the details. I would very much like you to be part of the start up team too. – Very much!

- Thank you very much, sir.

- No need to call me sir, Louis is fine.

- Strange, but ok.

- Hahahah you are very funny girl.

Girl? What an old man! Louis put your head on straight and starts talking to her like a man!

- Girl? How old do you think I am?

- According to your profile, which is here on my screen, you are 23 years old, you will turn 24 on June 30th, graduated in technology and computer science since 2011; you have several specialization courses, lives alone, is single, has two brothers and his family lives in the countryside. You live on the beach and come to the capital every day. Anything to add?

- Hmm I like rock, cartoons and hero movies...

- Great observation, I will note this here too, which is also very important information!

- Why?

- Because I also like rock, cartoons and hero movies, so in Recife we'll have something to talk about outside of work.

- Okay. You know everything about me and I know nothing about you.

- Well, there's not much to know about me. That I like rock, cartoons and hero movies is fine.

And that I am completely in love with you!

- And that you’re 28 years old.

- Yes... how do you know?

- Er. Everyone knows at the office. When is your birthday?

- November 24th...

- Your sign is Sagittarius.

- Do you believe in signs?

- No, but it's just that it's so easy to memorize which is each one.

- Truth. Your logic is good. That's why I like you!

- Sagittarius likes sex...

- What?

Ana, Ana. Are you teasing me? You are playing with fire! But those words made me smile from ear to ear. She's right, I like sex! Better hang up so I don't talk too much. It's enough my thoughts on her body, especially after this crazy conversation. She talked about sex... with me.

-Holy shit, sorry sir, I just thought and said, it jumped out of my mouth.

- No problem Ana. Better hang up. Tomorrow you talk to Paula and then we'll talk calmly, ok?!

- Yes sir.

- Good night Ana.

- Good night sir.

- Oh one more thing... your sign is cancer.

- Yes sir.

- Cancer likes romance!

I couldn't stand not saying shit, it's been seven months I've been thinking about how to get to it, what to say, how to say it, and today I finally had an opening, minimal I know, but I did so I took advantage of it. And she was the one who started it, you don't need to keep looking like: “But Louis, you are her boss”. That I already know, okay!

I went to sleep happily, I heard the word “sex” from her mouth, which means that in addition to being intelligent, beautiful is also good-mood!

I woke up a little late today, but I didn't make a point of running out of the house, I took my shower, changed into a gray suit and a black shirt. I picked up this blue tie that Duda says says it matches to the color of my eyes.

It was ten-twenty when I came out of the elevator, smiling and greeting everyone on the way, I held my cell phone in my right hand to check the time and lowered my backpack in my left hand straight towards her. I wanted to say good morning to her who was bending down to take her computer out of her backpack, when I was about to open my mouth, right in front of her, my cell phone rang:

- Good Morning.

- Hi Louis, are you at the office?

- Yes..

- Do you know Ana?

- Yes I know.

- I've already talked to her. And she's already accepted, I'll send the information about Recife today for her and John.

- Of course.

- Oh damn Louis, you had already talked to her and now I had to redo my speech.

- Okay.

- Okay? You must have some problem!

- Uhum.

-I hope that doesn't happen anymore, she made me look like a fool!

- It won't happen again Ms. Monteiro, have a good day.

I hung up the phone with that woman screaming in my ear, but I refuse to be mad about her today. The only good thing was that she accepted! I took a deep breath, picked up mu things I had left at my feet and turned to her before heading to my desk:

- Good morning Ana.

I lost all focus on what I was going to say about the great conversation we had yesterday! Although today's news is also great! She accepted and goes with me to Recife. I think your turn is coming, Mr Nurs.

Paula: Do you want to have lunch with me so we can resolve the misunderstanding of this morning?

Louis: No, I have a meeting at noon.

I looked at the clock and it was already noon, so I looked up and Ana was talking to Luana, probably to go to lunch. I'll send her an email asking her to come here.

She looked at her friend and me, then came with firm steps until she was standing in front of me.

- Good afternoon Ana, I'm glad you saw the email! I hope you're not too hungry, then I promise to buy you lunch!

And I made a Salute sign in a totally ridiculous gesture, but it made her smile beautiful.

- Well, you must have noticed the conversation I had this morning with Paula on the phone.

She stood there looking at me, all tense and I continued:

- Come girl, sit here soon I want to show you something!

So I spoke in a lower tone, making her body bend towards me to hear:

- She's crazy and you can't tell anyone I told you that!

- This is nothing new, I don't need to tell anyone, everyone already knows on their own.

- I knew you understood the connection! You are very smart! Even though I didn't drop a related word or a complete sentence, you knew she was fighting with me, right?

She blushed, beautifully embarrassed that she understood the call.

- No need to be mad at you for that, I didn't leave there on purpose, I wanted to know if you would understand. I need someone who understands me, after all we will be in Recife together, so I want this partnership to work.

- Ok sir.

- So... Ms. Monteiro didn't like that I spoke directly to you, but I didn't understand why, after all, you'll be working with me for at least another year. I was very happy to hear that you accepted the challenge. What made you accept?

- For the challenge, sir. I believe I can learn a lot from you.

- Good, it really made me calmer. No one else here would fulfill the role as well as you.

Of course it's for the challenge, or do you think she was going to say she was in love with you?

- Thank you for the trust.

- Well, it's 1pm, do you want to have lunch? I am leaving now!

- Don’t worry.

- I make a point. I know you were going out to lunch with Luana when I called you to talk now, without an audience.

When I smell that queasy smell of sweet perfume near me:

- Good afternoon Louis, sorry you are still in a meeting.

- Yes Paula, I said I would be. Can I help you?

- It's about Ana's transfer.

- Well she's right here. But since we're going out to lunch, you can talk to me later, around 3pm, can you?

- Of course Louis, I'll send a meeting invitation.

- Thanks. Shall we go Ana?

I got up and on an impulse was reaching out to help her out of her chair, but I caught my gallantry halfway there and turned to grab the suit at my side and the wallet from the backpack.

- I'm not going sir, thank you.

She went back to her desk and Paula continued to stand beside me.

- So?

- So what? You come talk to me at 3pm and now I'm going to lunch.

- Okay, see you later Louis.

She left and as soon as the elevator closed I went to Ana again who was still there.

- Ana, let's have lunch, you must be hungry!

- Where do you have lunch?

- Where do you choose, can it be?

- I don't think so, sir. The restaurants that we go must not be the same ones you go.

- Okay, so let's have a snack, deal?

- McDonalds?

- Then you exaggerated lady! Could it be another diner?

- Okay!

She got up and I couldn't hold back my smile following her steps and we went to the elevator. We went straight down from the 23rd floor to the garage.

- The mall is right there!

- I know, but this one is very tight, a lot of people, a lot of noise, a lot of smell.

"beep beep"

I pressed the car alarm to open and said:

- Please, Ana.

As soon as I started the car the system restarted the music that was previously at a higher volume than regular for most people, playing Nirvana, I turned my body fast to lower the volume speaking quickly while she started to laugh:

- Sorry, my God, my bad. - She was really laughing at me - What was so funny?

- You! Good thing the music was good, otherwise I would get out of the car running and screaming that I was being kidnapped by a crazy person.

- What?

- Oh man. I’m sorry!

She put her hands over her face to cover the embarrassment of having said that line and I had a sudden urge to take her face in my hands and kiss her, but I just put my hand tenderly over hers and lowered them smiling and said too unable to control my mouth:

- You're awesome Ana! I already said that I love you right! Let's go?

 It was a nice lunch, we talked a lot about what we are going to face in Recife, I tried to buy her lunch too, but she vehemently refused and as we went and got back in my car, I got her scent impregnated in my brain.

- Thanks Louis for the lunch.

- Business lunch.

I replied, trying to be playful, but then I thought I shouldn't have said that! It would have been better to have left it open.

At the end of the day, Byarn sent a message saying that he wanted a meeting with everyone tomorrow at half past eight in the morning. I sent a meeting invitation to all my employees and a separate message to John and Ana, as the meeting was to talk about Recife.

Already at home, and still thinking about our lunch, I remembered that she lives far away, and she may not be able to arrive on time tomorrow. Though she's always at the office before nine. However, this is a good excuse for me to send a message to her cell phone:

Louis: Ana good night, can you be at the office tomorrow at 8:30 am for a meeting on the 21st floor? I'm counting on you, Louis.

I kept looking at the device waiting for a return that didn't come. I could call, but it would be too much, it's not that important and it's late, she might already be asleep.



domingo, 20 de junho de 2021

Chap. 5 - Louis and her

 5.

December 20th, Saturday.

Two weeks. I have two weeks to relax and think about how I'm going to make that girl look at me.

- Hello

- Brother, are you going to Guarujá?

- I think so, why JP?

- When?

- On Monday.

- But will you be there all week?

- Sure thing, Christmas is on Thursday! Will the restaurant open?

- Yup, but Murilo will take care of everything these days.

- Then?

- It's just that there's a girl...

- You will not take any tail for Christmas with Mommy!

- Damn Louis...

- Don't even come and if I talk about it again I'll let Duda know!

- And then?

- It's ok for the weekend, but not for the holiday! 

- Okie.

- And how will you go?

- With you?

- How about her?

- I'll pick her up on Friday...

- In my car?

- You're so boring!

- I think I'll take the opportunity and go home with you!

- And are you going to be alone, here in São Paulo?

- Don’t know yet.

- Can I count on you then?

- OK.

My parents, Richard and Duda are already at the beach, I'll be at home all weekend and alone. Look how wonderful! I turned on my computer right after lunch, sat on the couch, and stretched my legs out on the coffee table with only the computer music playing. Something to relax: System Of A Down . I laughed to myself at my thoughts as the music started playing at a low volume, just for me. Music to relax!

I downloaded Ana's curriculum that was available on the TCH system and started reading:

“Name: Ana Clara Gusmão, I know! / Address: somewhere on the beach front / Phone: I already have it! / Education: 2011: Technology and Computer Science / Birthday: June 30, 24 / Emergency Contact: Her parents, Humm live close to mine / Relatives: Father, mother and two brothers / Extracurricular: many courses”

- Interesting! – I told myself taking a sip of the soda I had opened.

Would it be too much for me to show up at her house? I don't think she won't even be there, she should go to the countryside now for the holiday to be with her parents! And of course that would be too much!

Calm down Louis. Don't do any nonsense! My cell phone screen lights up on the couch.

Paula: What are you going to do this weekend?

I looked at my cell phone and the smile that was on my face thinking about Ana was gone right away. Paula, my ex. I closed my eyes for two seconds to take a deep breath and several images came back to me. Random images that I try to forget everyday.

***

"A son"

"A lot of blood"

"Fights"

"Screaming"

"Sadness"

"Grant"

"Betrayal"

"Anger"

"Fear"

***

I open my eyes again and have my cell phone in my hand, looking at the message from the one who did me so much harm and who is coming back today to piss me off. Fuck, after three years what does she want with me? I feel like throwing the device far away, but I take a deep breath and reply to her message:

Louis: Get the hell away from you!

Paula: Give me a chance!

Louis: Not half. Forget me!

Paula: Next week is Christmas and I'll be alone.

Louis: Go to your mother's house!

Paula: It's far!

Louis: Where I wanted to send you is much further away.

Paula: Geez Louis! Okay. We'll talk another day.

I don't even bother to answer again, I throw the device on the couch and look at my computer again, which was still open with Ana's resumé and her photo beside it. A much younger photo after all she has been working at TCH for five years, but with me she started working at the end of last year. I smiled again and turned up the music.

Some time later my cell phone starts ringing. I just hope it's not her. No, is my sister:

- Hi Duda.

- Hi brother, are you coming?

- Yes, on Monday.

- Why not today?

- Today there is a lot of traffic and tomorrow I'll sleep until I wake up...

- Are you poetic?

- I am!

- I Know.

- What do you know?

- Nothing my brother. We'll expect you on Monday then. Big kiss.

- Goodbye.

Oh fuck! All I need now is for Richard to have let the cat out of the bag! If he said anything to Duda I'm screwed.

***

December 22nd, Monday

- Wake up JP!

- Hello

- Damn JP, didn't I say I'd stop by at eleven?

- It's already eleven?

We arrived at Guarujá's house almost 4pm, not so much due to the traffic, but due to JP's delay in getting up and still packing his things.

- Hi mom – He got out of the car and with all his charm softened my mother's heart in less than ten minutes because we were late.

She gave me a tight hug and was already asking:

- Will you stay until the new year?

- I don't know mom!

- These single children of mine are so handful!

I gave her a wan smile and went to put my backpack in the bedroom.

Those five days were really fun, JP left his cell phone in his room almost every day so he didn't have calls every five minutes from any tail. I left mine on purpose. Everyone I cared about the most was here so there's no reason to keep my cell phone in tow. My problem, has first and last name, was Miss Ana Gusmão.

I couldn't stop thinking about her and that's why I almost lost once or twice in snooker to Duda, how dare. I just didn't lose it, because when was just missing one ball, she would get nervous and start squealing saying victory, then I would put my head in the right place and finish the game.

One night after several beers and still playing poker with my brothers Richard asked me, distracted in his thoughts:

- Hey Louis, how's that project of ours?

- Our project?

-Yeah, that one... - And he winked crookedly at me. What an idiot! But as we were all drinking I continued:

- I'll take John and Ana!

- What? Are you crazy?

- They’re my best employees!

- You can't take Ana!

- What project? – Duda asked

- From Recife my love...

- And why can't he take her?

Well, if she asked now it's because he hadn't said anything, except badly.

- She’s my employee Duda

- Is she hot? – JP asked

I looked at him in a strange way, strange even to me. I don't know what I felt at that moment and I said:

- Don't talk about her like that!

- Calm down brother, I just asked if she's hot.

- That's the problem JP – Richard continued – She's hot!

- So, introduces me to her!

- Shut up JP! – I replied looking at my cards again.

- Louis Gustavo, do you have anything to share with us?

- Duda, are you crazy?

- She's my employee and that's it. Richard thinks she’s not the right person for this project. You keep getting into the subject of our work and imagining things!

- If she's hot you can introduce me!

- JP, won't you come back tomorrow with a don't know who?

- I will, but what’s the problem?

- You're such a son of a bitch!

We finished that game and went to sleep. The next day, just after five o'clock, we were already heading back to São Paulo. I decided I was going to stay home! By myself.

I just thought I would! On Tuesday Richard's car appeared in front of the house without warning and was entering, I was lying on the couch, only in my underwear, with the air conditioning on and the bass on the speaker. Except for a sound, just like when I was younger and I was alone in my room.

- Are you really that lazy?

- Want to play?

He took a deep breath and asked:

- Is your guitar there?

- In the office...

We stayed from two in the afternoon until nine at night playing random songs and talking:

- So, have you decided?

- I'll get it, I told you!

- How?

- I'm still thinking about it.

- But meanwhile you can't go out with other women?

I looked at him serenely and replied:

- I don’t want!

- Louis?

- What’s?

- Just sex right?

- Yeah, I told you! - While looking at my fingers strumming the strings of the instrument.

- OK

- And what did you come here for?

- We came to spend the New Year here with you!

- What? – I screamed, straightening up on the couch and making a horrible sound with the strings.

- You can fight with your mother and Duda, I'm here today to let you know!

- You mean that tomorrow everyone comes here to my house?

- Exactly!

- And there's nothing I can do?

- No!

- Can we keep playing and pretend I don't know that yet?

- Of course yes!

That day Richard slept at my place, we were drinking and playing until late night and at ten in the morning my parents were already at the door with Duda. I swear I'll still get back the key I gave her!

We ended up with half a bottle of whiskey and a few beers, the room became an area with wires everywhere and the instruments left on the sofa. I don’t remember how we managed to go upstairs to sleep in bed, on top of the sheets, but it's great.

They arrived with all the food almost ready and quickly the kitchen was, which was hardly ever used, smelling of ham and coffee, all mixed together.

JP showed up fifteen minutes before New Year's, which almost made Duda have a heart attack. My parents don't care, they know JP can handle himself. But with me it's a little different, after everything that happened to me, they don't want to leave me alone anymore. And I'm starting to think that I don't want to be alone anymore either and there's only one person that pops into my head who can fill that space.

The TV guy started the countdown to next year:

10 - 9 - 8 - 7 - 6...

What do I want for this year? Money? Health? Peace? No!

I want her!

...5 - 4 - 3 - 2 - 1.

Happy New Year!

Everyone slept at home. As I only have three bedrooms, I had the misfortune of sleeping with JP, I told him to sleep on the couch, but he's worse than a child. In the middle of the night he came slowly and lay down beside me. What the hell.

January 1st, Thursday

- Good morning maiden - I told JP who was all sprawled pushing me with his knees on the bed, just like when we were kids.

- Good Morning, brother. Did you sleep well?

- I would have slept better if I were alone!

- Lie! This side of the bed needs softening! It's too hard!

I got out of bed laughing to take a shower and again, to my misfortune, my bathroom had no door, just a glass wall that separated the rooms after a small hallway. As soon as I was removing the shampoo from my hair, I hear his voice:

- You know brother...

- Damn JP, what a scare!

- Calm down, I just came to pee!

- OK. What is?

- You're acting strange!

- What do you mean as strange?

- Strange. You have your head in the clouds..

- I'm as everyday - I laughed, but she came to my head at the same time. I turned off the shower and grabbed the towel.

- No, you are not! And if even I noticed...

His voice trailed off, so he must have walked out of the bathroom as I wiped my face. Passed the towel over my head, smiling when I thought of Ana and when I opened my eyes to step out of the box he was leaning against the sink looking at me.

- Fuck JP, again? What a fright!

- That smile there! That's a woman!

- Don't talk nonsense!

- Don’t lie to me!

I took a deep breath and nodded:

- You're right, there is a person!

- That’s crazy, your sister is really good!

- What do you mean?

- Do you really think I had noticed something? She was the one with that in her head and told me and Richard. We obviously didn't know anything, but I decided to confirm it.

I grabbed the towel and slapped him hard on the leg, which was only in his underwear, leaving a welt on the side, behind his thigh.

- Idiot!

- Fuck Louis, it hurt! But why are you so nervous about it?

- She doesn’t know!

- So tell me!

- I can’t!

- I know her?

- No! And it's not to confirm anything to Mary Eduarda, do you understand me? Otherwise she'll be bugging me.

- Okay, shows me a picture at least.

- No names!

I opened the photo I got from that ridiculous betting site and put it along with her number. I showed it to JP who put both hands over his mouth, saying muffled between his fingers: “Fuck, she is hot” with wide eyes. She is really beautiful!

- Ok you convinced me now and I promise to be quiet!

- I don’t expect any less!

For lunch everyone was still at my place, and we ate just yesterday's supper, as we always do. We had a sparkling wine that JP brought and everything was fine, until someone rang the doorbell. My mom went to the door, which I had even forgotten was my home.and not hers, as is always the case.

She opens the door and then slams it very hard and when she turns to us, that are all looking at her because of the noise, she is white. I run towards her and JP opens the door to see who it is, he leaves and closes the door behind him. I still don’t know. and take mom to the sofa

- Alright mother? Who is it?

- Nobody worth it! Tell JP to come in now that I'm ordering.

- OK...

- Not you! Duda goes there!

- OK mother!

Duda jumps up from the bench she was on and goes out the door closing behind her and then I hear her high-pitched voice:

- What do you think you're doing here?

I stretch my body, snap every finger on my hand and my neck. already knowing who it is! I take a deep breath, trying to hold the anger inside my chest, and head to the door.

- JP, Duda, come in please!

- But Lou...

- JP, take Duda and I'll fix it here.

- I'm still taking you down, bitch! – Duda enters screaming, kind of carried by JP and by Richard who went there to help. I close the door again and turn to the blonde statue standing at the bottom of the stairs:

- What are you doing here?

- I came to wish you a happy new year!

- Okay, now you can go.

- Louis, please!

- Paula, no! How many times will you have to hear this word to understand? Have you forgotten everything we've been through?

- No, but as you just said, it's past!

- A past I don't want to relive! Go meet one of your real men and leave me alone!

I was trying to speak in a low, controlled voice, then she started to cry. I don't want to console anyone either! My dad opened the door behind me and saw her thin, sobbing silhouette in front of me.

- Son, your mother wants to talk to you!

I looked at that gentleman so calm and nodded, not even looking back when I closed the door leaving them two alone. It didn't take more than ten minutes for my father to be back in the room, with his serene smile and asking:

- Who's up for a game of pool?

- Me! – Duda got up and went to the table that is between the kitchen and the stairs to the bedrooms and I went to the fridge to get a beer.

- Man, get one for me too!

-Here – I handed it to Richard – She's crazy and she wants to drive me crazy!

- She is mad! But try not to think about it anymore!

-Yes bro– JP took a beer too and continued – Think about that other princess you showed me!

He cheers the bottle against mine and went to the table with Duda and my father.

- Did you tell him?

- He cornered me this morning in my room, but he doesn't even know who she is, or her name, nothing!

- You're a bighead! - And he slapped me on the head.

- Richard, don't do that with Louis! - My mother fought with him and I laughed at the silly face he made.

- Sorry Miss Sonia.

Later that same crazy day, my dad came up to me:

- You know that as soon as you closed the door she stopped crying right!

- I know! She is underhanded!

- So I don't want you to be thinking about what happened, neither today nor about anything related to this subject!

- Okay dad.

- I love you son.

- Thanks Dad.

"I love you..."

It's just three words, which I haven't been able to say since she left my life. Not for my parents; nor for my brothers.

This viper who goes by Paula is my ex-wife.

That's right, I was already married and almost made a family with her. How have things changed so much?

She got pregnant when I was 23 and had two miscarriages. I was very young. She was very young, but it had gotten into her head that she wanted to be a mother. She put in that same little crazy head that it was my fault and she started to fuck to any male avaiable because I wasn't a real man even to give her child. I was in love with her, and it took me a while to understand that this relationship was only doing me harm. I did several tests at her request and even after we were no longer together, just to make sure that everything was really fine with me.

I can't pronounce these three simple words, not even to my parents.

It's been three years since we split up, and right after the split it was pretty tense. Six months ago she started working at TCH as HR manager at the headquarter. Same place as me.. Among so many companies in the world, she came to work in the same one as me. For what reason?

I can't understand, including why she had to show up in my life, at the same time someone else, one who was I really caring, making me finally change the angry feeling I had for her, for one I still can't identify. Of? Feather? Disgusted?

I will try JP's advice.

For the first time in his life he's right.

I'll think about the other woman!




Chap. 4 - Louis and Her

4

November 25th, Tuesday.

I didn't go to work in the morning the next day, I needed to rest since I didn't get a wink of sleep thinking about what had happened, I think Richard is right, as of today I'm going to change my way inside the office and try to get her away from me. Maybe it works.

I received an email from Byarn informing me that the project would be underway and soon the contract would be signed. It will be a great opportunity for me and for whoever will work with me.

As soon as I arrived at the office, I spoke to whoever I met on the way and sat down, looking directly in front of my desk at the left side of her body. She's been focused on something since the elevator opened and hasn't lifted her head yet, but it's me looking directly at her that her head turns to me and our eyes meet in that small distance of about 16 or 19 feet away. She smiles and lowers her eyes again, turning to face the computer.

I suppressed my lips in a thin line to keep from smiling too and turned to the computer.

- I can't and I shouldn't! – I spoke through gritted teeth to myself.

From now on I would be someone else, and I can't treat her badly just because it’s her, I'll have to be the bad-tempered boss with everyone, nobody will like it, but it will be necessary.

***

Deadlines will be shorter. Delays won’t be tolerated. Reports must be delivered when and on time I request them. Jokes with me? Not anymore, just between them.

Little by little it started to kills me, I'm not like that and it wasn't working at all, because every time I set a shorter deadline, or argued with someone about the tickets or delays, she was the one who took the lead in the work. leaving me more and more impressed by their professionalism and collegiality.

December 5th, Friday.

The company will close from December 22nd to January 5th so today we will have a meeting to let everyone know about our ongoing projects, open tickets and new projects.

I'm already in the living room waiting for everyone to arrive, sitting in the chair furthest from the door and closest to the air conditioning, with the computer in front, there's still twenty minutes to go before the scheduled time. In addition to my three Musketeers – Ana, Miguel and John – I have nine more employees with me, which makes us a relatively large team. I turn my chair slightly to face the large window on my right, and it's blazingly sunny outside.

Gradually the room starts to fill up and people talking to each other fill the sound of the room, which was silent before, I still don't turn my chair, I just look at the clock and wait for the meeting time, I notice that people come in talking, but when they realize that I'm already there, they lower their voices and as I don't turn around, I don't even get a “good afternoon”. Crap! At least the plan is working, I'm getting everyone away from me, except her out of my head.

At the appointed time, I turn to the table and speak to the person closest to the door:

- Juliano, can you close the door?

- Of course sir.

He gets up and when he's almost closing Ana appears pushing the door hard to get in last. She straightens up after the door opens, apologizes to Juliano and turns to me:

- Good afternoon sir, sorry.

I look at her, who has a blouse hanging over her left arm, a small bottle of water between her arms, clutching the computer to her chest and still holding her cell phone between her fingers, her face red from running here. I want to smile at her, but I can't.

- Good afternoon, Miss Gusmão. Just in time, close the door and please sit down.

Damn Louis, it didn't have to be so harsh! But now it's done.

To my bad luck the only vacant chair is beside me, after all, nobody wants to sit next to the boring boss. She crosses the room holding the computer in her arms and coming to my side, leans over to put things on the table and then has her free hand to pull out the chair. I can't be that indifferent to the situation.

I turn around and pull out the chair to help her sit down holding the water bottle that had nearly fallen between her arms.

- Thank you sir! - She answers me seriously without looking at me. Congratulations Louis, you managed to push her away for good! You don't even have a look anymore.

- You're welcome Ana!

I took a deep breath and looked at everyone in the room, who had their respective computers open and now waiting for me to say something since I was already standing.

- Good afternoon everyone. As you know, the company will close from December 22nd to January 5th so I want you to give me the status of all existing problems now. If there’s something very serious, the person responsible for it will continue working until it’s resolved, understood? That's why we're here, two weeks before the collective vacation so that it doesn't happen to anyone. I don't want anyone to work during this period!

The buzz started in the room and everyone had problems, the only three who didn't were Miguel, John and Ana, that's because I always gave them the worst cases. I really hope to solve everything, because if someone comes to work I have to work! And I really don't want to! But with two weeks' notice, I'm sure these people will race against time to get everything in order.

- Sir?

- Yes Ana...

- We can help the staff, just pass a few more tickets to our queue!

- Is not fair! – I spoke loudly and without thinking. That's not a manager's phrase!

She kept looking at me with those big almond eyes and I continued:

- But you're right again! We are a team.

She opened a sincere smile and I tried my best to hold mine, which closed into a side curve. I turned to my computer and got all the existing ticket listings and we were splitting it all up again among the twelve.

At five o'clock I dismissed everyone as I continued in the room checking my emails and my cell phone lights up with the arrival of messages:

Richard: Are you leaving on time today?

JP: It's with Louis right?

Richard: Of course it is! You can leave whenever you want.

JP: It's not like that either.

Richard: Louis?

Louis: I don't think so. A meeting just ended and I'm still checking my emails.

Richard: Have you seen Byarn's?

Louis: No, just a minute.


“From: Byarn.mol@tch.com

To: Louis.nurs@tch.com; Richard.sanches@tch.com; Carlos.santos@tch.com; jose.duarte@tch.com

Subject: Signed contract

Guys, good afternoon

It is with great satisfaction that I inform you that we have won the Recife account.

Now I need to know which of the four of you, to help me choose who will lead this project.

Until June of next year, I will need the full scope and the names that will be part of the team. Talk to each other and next week we will have a meeting to align the points.

The signed contract is attached. But this one, everyone already knows.


Good weekend,

Byarn Mol,

CEO Brazil"


JP: What is it?

Richard: JP, work thing.

JP: So why didn't you send a private message to Louis?

Richard: I sent the first group I had opened, now don't piss off.

Richard: Louis?

Louis: Fuck, it worked!

Richard: So I thought it wouldn't do.

Louis: What do you think?

Richard: That the name of the time is yours!

Louis: Me?

Richard: I just picked up a new client and I'm hardly in the office. Joe won't want it because of his daughter.

Louis: There's still Carlos.

Richard: Between someone married and someone single, who do you think goes to Recife?

JP: Recife?

Louis: You might be right.

Richard: Do you want?

Louis: Damn of course!

Richard: So memorize this contract for next week's meeting.

JP: Changing the subject, what are you guys doing this weekend?

Richard: Barbecues here at home, deal?

JP: Deal!

Louis: All right.


I leaned back in the chair smiling like I hadn't done in the office in a long time with my cell phone in my hand, so Ana knocks on the door and asks:

- Sorry sir, may I come in?

- Of course Ana, what can I help?

- About the tickets, it wouldn't be a problem if I sat down a little with the staff, right?

She came walking towards me as she spoke.

- Of course not! It would be a big favor.

- Thank you sir.

- Ana...

She turned to me, almost leaving, and placed her hand on the back of the chair that had previously been sitting beside me.

- Nevermind, you can go.

- Sure sir

You're an idiot Louis, just saying "thank you" won't hurt!

- Ana… – I called again and saw that she had forgotten the bottle of water on the table – Is this yours?

- Oh yeah, thank you!

She went back to get it, but before handing it to her outstretched hand I got up from the chair and leaned against the table, my back to the door and passed the bottle to my other hand, putting it back on the table. She looked at me confused and stopped in front of me.

- Thanks!

- For what sir?

She stretched out and grabbed the bottle that was beside me still looking at me quizzically at the simple word I had just uttered.

I saw her opened the bottle to take a sip, and I was transfixed looking at her parted lips as she slowly turned the liquid inside her mouth, at that exact moment her cell phone rings in her pocket, causing some of the water to trickle out of the corner of her mouth. She runs her fingers in a hurry to clean it up and puts the bottle in my hand taking the cell phone from her pocket. I looked at the clock, five-fifteen. Same time as usual, it must be an alarm clock.

Before returning the bottle, smiling I take a big swig of her water and return it to her hand:

- For everything, always. And for the water.

- You're welcome sir. Gotta go, good weekend.

- You too.

She left and I stood there, leaning against the table looking out the big glass window, watching the cars scurry back and forth as another day wore on.

It's not fucking working!

***

december 10th, wednesday

After the meeting with Byarn, I ended as the responsible for the Recife project, and I didn't have to make any effort for that since none of the three wanted to get him anyway.

- Louis, you will choose two names for this project and I hope they are your best employees! I don't want absolutely anything to go wrong with this project.

- Of course sir, I have three names in mind, I just have to choose between them.

Richard kept looking at me with a weird face and as soon as the meeting was over he came to talk to me:

- Tell me her name is not among the three!

- Of course it is! She is my best employee!

- And who are the other two?

- Miguel and John.

- Then take them both!

- But she's the best. Didn't you hear me?

-Are you listening to yourself?

I scratched my head and looked between his shoulders at the hallway that led to the pantry, the three of them were going together for coffee. He followed my gaze and put his arm around my shoulder saying:

- Louis. No!

- I know!

- Then why are you smiling?

- I'm not smiling!

- Yes you are.

- I thought about the bet...

- Nothing yet!

- Exactly.

- You're a romantic kid, that's it!

- No, I’m not. What if it's just desire?

- Maybe, now we started talking like a real dumb men, as I like.

- I feel something when I touch her...

- Lust?

- Speak the fuck down!

- Lust? – He repeated in a whisper and I laughed in agreement.

- Fuck! I feel like a lot of things.

- That's abstinence! You should go out with JP one of these days just to catch up.

- How’s my sister with you?

- I am a gentleman!

- I know what a gentleman you are!

- If I say that she likes, you'll be mad!

- Then don't say anything!

- That's why I don't!

- Then you could take that toothy smile out of your mouth too, right!

- My bad!

- OK...

- Tell me: Have you ever jacked off thinking about her?

- I don’t do that!

- So you're really dry since the carnival?

- Well...

- Well what? Explain to me once I couldn't understand these two pieces of information with your face.

- These days I dreamed of her...

- And you were doing...?

- Er...

- Damn Louis, your case is more serious than I was imagining!

I looked at the pantry door the three were going back to their desks, Richard slaps me on the head so I turn my attention to him and I look at him cursing:

- What was the shit?

- Do you think you have a chance?

- I do not know.

- Do you want to try?

- Perhaps...

- Okay. I'll support you in this one just because you're my friend, you need and she's really cute.

- What do you mean by that?

- That she's pretty, duh.

- I got this! - I glared at him - What do you mean by "I'll support you"...

- Go talk to her!

- I can’t. What language do I have to speak for you to understand?

- First make sure this shit isn't platonic, because it can even be reciprocated. You're not ugly either!

- What?

- I won't repeat that!

I laughed and walked towards the pantry. He came after me saying:

- What do you think?

- You want me to try to take her to bed!

- Yup.

- And if I can? How will I come to work afterwards?

- That's why you have to be sure! If she hasn't dated anyone until today, she must be a smart person not to mix things up.

- Smart she really is!

- Then go. Wait for the right time and attack!

- I don’t know.

- Do you want to fuck her or not?

- I do...

- Then that's it. Let's probe the territory first.

I agreed with him and it was the worst thing I could have done!

If before his curious eyes already invaded my thoughts even though I didn't want to, imagine now that I've decided that I wanted to. I looked at her and already imagined what it would be like under her dress clothes. Whenever I saw her drinking water, she would close her eyes a little before swallowing the liquid and then run her tongue over her lips and I would dream of her mouth on my body.

I woke up several times with these thoughts and had to get up to take a shower, but I never made the same mistake of taking a hot bath again. I would duck under the icy shower to clear my thoughts and my blood would return to normal and my heart would beat just the right rhythm.

Okay. Not always.

There were times when I came home straight to the hot bath, because as soon as I felt the water warm my body, the steam around me brought her smell and the silence of the bathroom mixed with my breathing and my most obscene imagination excited me. to the point of reaching orgasm just holding my hard body, no sudden movement was necessary. It didn't even have to be in the bathtub, sometimes just with the water running hot on my back and a hand leaning on the wall I exploded into my thoughts.

***

December 19th, Friday.

It arrived, the Friday so dreaded by everyone and thanks to the efforts of the entire team we had no urgent tickets or pending. Lucas and Guilherme will take turns during the recess period, to stop being muggles and not bet with something so serious.

They weren't very happy, because I made it clear that I didn't want to be bothered by the inability of one of them to answer some clients. I wasn't sorry for the two of them at all and they were scared to death of shit during that time.

Well after today, we'll see each other next year, on January 5th. I made sure to buy a box of candy for each of my employees with a Happy Holidays card. As Ana is the only female employee I have, no one could say anything when they saw that along with the gift there was also a red rose, on the card was written the same thing as for the others. Happy Holidays.

From a distance I could see John and Miguel mocking her for the flower, I turned my eyes to the computer laughing as I noticed her face turning towards me. A Flower, beautiful, soft, striking, unreachable.

Yes, I did it on purpose.

It doesn't matter what Richard said.

Even though I'm lying to him, saying it's just sex.

I won't lie to myself anymore, I've already admitted my insanity.

She I was going to have for myself and it wouldn't be just for one night!

Not even.




sábado, 19 de junho de 2021

Chap.3 - Louis and Her

3.

I stayed looking at him, who was smiling from the corner of his mouth as he took another sip of his beer, my hands were cold, even with the absurd heat he was doing today in São Paulo. I felt my feet sweat at the dreaded confession I would have to make to him, and speaking out loud about something that shouldn't be happening just makes it more real.

He snapped his fingers in front of my eyes and I brought the beer to his mouth, which was starting to get dry and the other hand I brought it to the back of my neck.

- It's no use looking at me with those wide blue eyes! It looks like the look of Duda when she buys a shoe for five hundred and says it cost a hundred.

I gulped down the liquid that was still trapped in my mouth and with my legs splayed on the floor, I rested my elbows on my knees, still holding the bottle, clasped both hands in the center and lowered my head to them, feeling like shit.

- Hey – He called me after a while – I got it? Really?

I turned my face to him, still leaning with my forearms on my legs, and lifted the little bottle that was in my hand saying:

- Long live Louis! Yay!

- Geez Louis, when I said I was kidding! I didn't think it would be...

- Well, I wish it was a joke!

- It's not possible! Who is the mystery woman? Speak up, you can say it!

- It's Ana, Richard. - Then I repeated in a low voice - It's Ana...

- Louis, she's your employee!

- You think I don't know that?

- She knows?

- Of course not!

- You will talk?

- I can't say anything! Biggest problem I'll get!

- Yup...

- Can you finish telling me what happened last night after we left?

- You don't want to know!

I threw myself on the back of the sofa, heads back and looking at the ceiling:

- Maybe I'll get her out of my head!

- You'll like it even less now!

- Speak up Richard!

- Nothing!

- Nothing? What do you mean, nothing?

- Nothing, nothing happened! From what Joe told me now, Lucas tried to kiss her, but he must have been a little tipsy, it was late, almost time for them to leave, he grabbed her around the waist to kiss her... - My blood froze when he said that – But she kneed him in the balls, so he let her go.

I raised my head to him, not understanding and delighted with the discovery. My flower!

- Why did you say I wouldn't like it?

- Because she's still available, which for you and that little romantic head is the same thing as: She's mine!

I looked at him trying to hold back a smile as that was exactly what I was thinking! I couldn't imagine Ana with anyone and if she wasn't with anyone until today, it's because I have a chance!

- I'll get another beer, will you?

- Louis, come back here!

- Would you like? – I was already standing in the middle of the room.

- I do! What will you do?

- Nothing!

- Are you sure?

- Richard – I handed the beer into his hand – What can I do?

- I don't know.... Nothing I think.

- See!

- And so?

- I do not know. But it's fucked! I can't think about going out with someone else that I start to think about her.

- How old are you really going to be? 28 or 18?

- I don't want neither Duda nor JP to dream of this information!

- OK!

- Really! No way to have someone in my life, who is great without anyone!

- You should focus on that sentence to stop thinking about this girl.

- I know!

- Tomorrow is your birthday, what will you do tonight?

- Sleep!

- Not even a pizza? You'll have to have dinner, won't you?

- Only if it's here at my place!

- For me, it's a deal!

We watched television until Duda arrived, at half past six, but soon they left! Our team lost so I was extra sullen so helped that she wouldn't stay too long or ask too many questions.

- Good night Lu.

- Hi Duda!

- How about tomorrow?

- Pizza. Here at home!

- Geez. Why can't it be in a pizzeria at least?

- Because I don’t want to! Otherwise I won't!

- Boring! What happened?

- My team lost!

- Big Deal! - She look to Richard who was almost asleep on the couch - Shall we love?

- Hey? Who? Let's go!

- Bye then until tomorrow Lu!

- Bye Louis, see you tomorrow!

- Bye, are you going to the office tomorrow?

- No, I'll be on the client...

- Okay. See y’all tomorow!

As soon as they closed the door I plopped down on the couch again and put my feet up on the coffee table. I turned off the television and stared at the ceiling with my head lying on the couch with both arms behind my head.

- Why? – I spoke loudly and smiled thinking of her, when she gets embarrassed and her cheeks get all blush. Her skin so white and eyes the color of honey. She has straight hair and frayed at the ends, but they are darker than her eyes, they look like brown. In the sun they are a little reddish, it's a little below the shoulders, but it's almost always with them tied up in a ponytail. Standing next to her I look like a gangly giant at six feet. She is short and thin, has a perfect hourglass figure, with her full breasts and wide hips.

I went to the gym to tire my body a little and get to sleep faster. I ran almost 7 miles and still went to do weight training. I need a peaceful night's sleep!

***

November 24th, Monday.

At nine I was already at the bakery ordering black coffee and grilled bread, the usual! There was a waitress who always made a point of attending to me, she was very attractive, I believe that if I had been in the ass spirit of a year or two ago I would have already given her a lead, but today I can't.

- Good morning sir, what do you want?

- The usual, please.

- An espresso and a grilled bread?

- Exactly. Thanks!

And there she goes, waddling to the counter to meet another customer. Well, today she was wearing a black bra and the pen tucked between her breasts. Very suggestive! I might not want anything to do with her, but she leans over my desk, can't help but look into her cleavage.

I slung my backpack over my right shoulder and headed toward the cashier. First message of the day:

JP: Happy birthday asshole! See you later!

Louis: Thanks brat!

I put the cell phone back in my pants pocket and thought: Today is my birthday. I'll get a hug, will I? I straightened my body and got in the car again, heading towards the office. It would only be a five-minute journey. I might as well leave the car in the building's parking lot and walk to the bakery, but no! I come here by car, cursing the traffic on this street every day and then going out and cursing the traffic again.

But today, the streets were incredibly quiet.

My lucky day?

I got off the elevator in the hallway of my department, it was nine forty, everyone was already at their desks, and talking about the weekend. I strode straight to my desk.

I greeted two people as I crossed the hall and sat down.

She was sitting in her chair, with John standing beside her, talking and laughing about something. Across the table Miguel was laughing too. I'm curious, I think I'll go there!

I arranged the suit around my neck and walked to Miguel and Ana's table:

- Good Morning!

- Good morning sir!

- How was the weekend?

- Great fun Louis – John replied.

- That's good!

- You don't know what Lucas did... - Miguel started to speak and Ana cut him off:

- Miguel. You won't be saying these things!

- Now I want to know! What’s up?

- Yeah Ana, soon the entire TCH will know! – John said.

- So - He looked at her and continued - Lucas and Ana were at the same club this weekend, then he was half drunk and tried to kiss her...

He started to laugh and couldn't finish the story, I was already smiling because I knew what had happened, but I turned to Ana and John to finish the story. John continued:

- Then he grabbed Ana...

- He didn't grab me!

- Yes, he did! At least he tried.

- Grab? – I spoke angrily, then trying to change the tone for a joke.

- No sir, he tried something with me, but it didn't work!

- Yeah – Miguel composed himself and finished counting – I didn't know why she kicked him in the balls!

- Didn't kick! Knee! - She corrected.

- Wow! Are you alright Ana? – I spoke to her with concern.

- I am, sir. Nothing happened!

- I want to see Lucas come talk to you today! – John still said jokingly and I looked towards his desk, which was empty, but with the computer on, he had arrived at least.

- That's good! So, since everything is fine with everyone, let's get to work!

-Louis – Miguel caught my attention – I received an email from HR informing him that today is your birthday, is that right?

I was already facing away from my desk when he said this, I took a deep breath and turned to them again:

- It is! Good morning people! – I was about to turn around again when I feel John's heavy hand on my shoulders:

- Congratulations boss! Many years of life!

He gave me a hug with a pat on the back, as did Miguel who stood up next, pulling me by the hand first.

- Congratulations Louis! I promise to try not to give you any problems today!

- I hope so! Thanks.

As soon as he walks away I see Miss Ana getting up from her chair, leaning her hands on the table and stepping forward to greet me too, she gives me a sheepish smile and starts to reach out to congratulate me, John says something in her ear, which makes her a little red instantly, then takes my hand.

In those few seconds, I felt a shiver and heat go through my body, she was still taking a step forward, so I gave her hand a slight tug, almost imperceptible to the others, forcing her to come closer and so I got a hug.

She raised her left arm and went around my neck, our right hands were still together between us, so I let go and went around her waist, she bent her body a little and wrapped this arm around my neck too, I had to lower it a little to fit my body into hers and I took a deep breath of the scent of her hair.

- Happy Birthday Mr Nurs!

She spoke with her mouth close to my ear, her voice soft and began to separate our bodies. Before letting her go, I spread my two hands beside her waist and looking into her eyes I thanked her:

- Thank you Miss Gusmão!

She lowered her eyes with a slight smile on her lips and her cheeks turned a little pink, but soon she was no longer in my arms so I went back to my desk.

Does my presence also affect her as she does me?

I worked the rest of the morning with that unhappy thought haunting me.

- Happy birthday Louis!

I heard a syrupy voice beside me, nothing like Miss Gusmão.

- Thanks!

- Won't you even get up so I can give you a hug?

- Paula, we're in a work environment. Please!

- Okay. How about you go out to lunch with me then? It's already noon.

- No thank you. I'm going with Richard.

- He's not even at the company!

- We'll meet for lunch! He is part of my family, and you know it very well!

- And Am I nothing?

- Yes! You are nothing!

- Okay, bye Louis and congratulations!

- Thanks!

After ten minutes of curling up in the chair, I couldn't stand it any longer with irritation and went out to lunch alone. I got in the car and went to the furthest mall, sat at a table inside the restaurant and ordered meat and chips. It's perfect! Happy Birthday to me!

- Hello, hi mom!

- Happy Birthday son!

- Thank you mother!

- Where are you?

- Lunching...

- And at night?

- JP and Duda are going to my house, but that's it! Will you come?

- I think so, I'll talk to your father!

- There won't be anything, just pizza!

- The important thing is to be together!

- Yes it is mother!

- Speak a little with your father, bye son. Love you!

- Bye mom...

- Congratulations son, almost thirty huh!

- I've just turned twenty-eight and you're saying almost thirty?

- Closer and closer!

- It is true!

- I'm kidding, son! But we’ll go! What time?

- I leave at half past five! Six or seven pm I'll be home!

- Ok, we’ll leave here at half past five too, the time will be fine!

- Yes father. We’ll be waiting for you guys!

- Kisses son, see you later.

- Bye dad.

My parents live about 60km from here, in the interior. We don't always see each other, but we see each other whenever possible! When I got the rib tattoo, my mom was a little mad at me, but after I said it means “family” I managed to soften her heart.

Also, after I made the skeleton suit on my right calf and a Mayan bracelet on my left forearm, she either gets used to it or she gets used to it! I'm dying to get another tattoo, I just don't know what or where yet! Another thing I love, and my mother not so much, is my motorcycle, but I only use it on the weekend, usually to go to their house, the city is quieter there.

I got back to the office at about two in the afternoon. I finished an important report and received confirmation of a new project that we are working hard on, but it's still a secret. In early December as soon as they sign the contract I call my team to talk!

Carlos and Joe appeared in front of my desk at half past four in the afternoon, shouting and getting up to wish me a happy birthday, as soon as I got up, all the employees in the sector got up and came towards me singing happy birthday and Paula was holding a cake with several candles on top.

How absurd!

I looked around and everyone was there, including her! Clapping, smiling and singing to me. Okay. It might not be that bad!

Soon that line formed to congratulate me again, Paula took longer than necessary and with her body tighter to mine than I wanted, I could only smell the cloying smell of her cloying sweet perfume, taking all the shine from her little body. runway model and commercial smile. The three Musketeers, which was how I secretly calls John, Ana and Miguel, were further back, talking to each other and waiting for the people to disintegrate from my table.

Miguel then places a small box in Ana's hand and pushes her one step forward. I give her an easy smile, following her with my gaze until she's in front of me again.

- Happy birthday again, Mr Nurs!

- Thank you, Ana!

- Here's a gift from your entire team, I hope you like it!

She reached out to hand me the gift and I put my hand underneath it, so I felt that wave of heat going through my body again. I closed my eyes quickly to absorb that tension and let go of her hand that pulled her then crossing her arms in front of me waiting for me to open the package.

I placed the box on the desk and ripped the paper. Inside was a miniature of my motorcycle, a Harley-Davidson Heritage Softail, beautiful. I took that little acrylic box very carefully out of the wrapping and lifted it up to my face, staring at every perfect detail it had! I put my present back on the table and grabbed Ana just like I do to my sister. I lowered my body a little to put my arms under her arms and held her head with one hand squeezing her body against mine:

- Damn Ana, how beautiful! It cost! I loved it!

- You're welcome...

She hugged me back for mere seconds, until I realized she wasn't my sister, that I wasn't home and that there were a lot of people around.

I released her slowly and then pulled Miguel and John by the hand to hug them tight too! Thanking you for the gift and disguising my excitement, so it wasn't just one person.

- Guys! I loved it! Now, what about this cake? Is it to eat or not?

Soon the office was already a mess, with people eating the cake and no one was going back to work until half past five! I leaned back against my desk and picked up my bike again, it was really beautiful! The three were apart again, talking, so I went to them again:

- Who came up with the idea? – I asked the three, and Ana started to answer:

- We asked Richard for a picture of you...

- Photograph?

- Yeah, for the card, it's inside the package! So, then Richard sent one of you to the side of the bike. I thought it would be cool!

- Damn Ana, I really loved it!

- That’s awesome sir!

I got closer to her while the boys were in a side conversation, I rested a hand on her waist and kissed her cheek, very close to the curve of her lips and said:

- Thank you so!

- My pleasure!

I turned away very happy with myself, because she didn't try to kick me in the balls because of that and I could still see her face flushing before she left.

As soon as I sat in my chair, looking at the bike I thought about what I had just done, how crazy! What was I thinking?

We are inside the office, during business hours, she is my employee and I have just almost kissed her.

Damn Louis, are you crazy? This can't happen anymore!

- Hello - I spoke sharply into the phone without looking at who it was.

- Geez, today your team lost again?

- Hi Duda, sorry.

- Congratulations little brother! I just called for this...

- Sorry and thanks! It's just that things got a little tense here in the office just now. Are you coming tonight?

- Of course!

- So, see you later!

- Bye brother! Love you!

- Goodbye.

I raised my head and she was already packing her things to leave, she put her backpack on her back and looked in my direction before pushing the chair to tidy up against the table, smiled and said goodbye shaking her head almost imperceptibly, and I did the even back.

It's Louis, you're fucked up and in love!

*********

As soon as I got home, Richard was already there with Duda, I went through the kitchen, went straight past the back of the counter and with a brief wave of my hand I went to my room first. I threw the backpack on the bed, along with the suit, which was already in my arms, and began to loosen my tie. As soon as I put my bare feet on the floor Richard knocks on the door:

- Are you going to drink today?

- Certainly!

- Hadn't you stopped drinking on a weekday?

- Today I need it!

- Can I enter?

- No! I'm naked!

- Fuck that rubbish! - And entered anyway. I was still in my pants and my shirt was out and starting to unbutton.

- Shit Richard, let me take a shower!

- I will! I just want to know: What happened?

- Nothing happened!

- No?

I pulled the shirt over my head without unbuttoning it completely and took the cup that was in his hand taking a big gulp and almost spat it all back:

- What is it you're taking?

- It's ice tea in a whiskey glass. To get a bundle!

- Did you take your meds today?

- Hurry up, tell me! Downstairs, Duda will be close.

- I fucked up!

I told about the hug and the kiss...

- Fuck Louis!

- Yeah, I know....

- I'll bet on you now!

- Can you focus on my problem?

- Okay... What are you going to do?

- I need to get her away from my mind!

- How, you're the boss. Do you want her to go to another project?

- No, you freaked out? She is one of my best employees!

-Stop being so nice, starts being that idiot boss.

- How?

- Think everyone is Paula!

- Then I'll want to kill them!

- It's a beginning.

As today is Monday, at ten pm everyone was already leaving. Another night I lay in bed with my head full of shit and to help, it was just me closing my eyes that I could smell her again and feel her skin against mine. Result?

I woke up in the middle of the night with a painful erection between my legs, it took me even to get out of bed and go to the bathroom. I put the tub to fill and while I waited I rested my hands on the sink and looked at my reflection in the mirror. My cheeks were red, my hair plastered to my forehead from sweat, my skin glowed sensitive to the touch. My eyes, which normally had a shade of light blue, were gray.

I took a deep breath and felt her scent again invading my brain, the silence of my house just with the noise of the water falling into the bathtub, made my heart pound inside my ear, louder and louder. I tightened my grip on the sink until my knuckles turned white, and again my skin began to sweat.

I was still wearing my underwear, I had gone to sleep, the feeling of the fabric on my body started to bother me, I put my right hand on it, which was stiff and sore, took off my underwear quickly and went into the bathtub , releasing my breath at once, so I leaned my head back and closed my eyes to try to relax.

Immediately her eyes invaded my head, her perfume permeated my entire bathroom and mixed with the steam rising from the hot water I had placed in the bathtub. A few random phrases in her voice banged in my ear meaningless: “Mister Nurs” “you're welcome” “good” “pleasure”.

With my head back, I squeezed my eyes closed and my hands on the edge of the tub, my brain fantasizing about her body and her touch like a wet dream. And so, without even touching my hands on me, I came moaning low, uncontrollably, I looked at my body that was not obeying my commands and was pulsing in the hot water so that little by little I could really relax.

I let out the breath that had been held, hard and fast.

Shit!

What the fuck was that?

I got up with everything from the bathtub after a few minutes still not understanding what had just happened. It felt like I was still in the dream, but I had just gotten up to push away the same thoughts that woke me up, and that came back even more intensely due to the heat of the water, my heartbeat, my sensitive skin and the blood rushing through my veins making my body throb in a fantasy created by my psyche and I finished showering.

I need to do something about this! Urgently!



Chap.2 - Louis and Her

2.

November 22nd, Saturday.

- JP, I already said I'm going in my car!

- Brother, we decided to make it a surprise, we will pick you up at your place so be ready at 11pm.

What the fuck are they up to? After a quick shower I quickly got dressed into simple jeans, a black t-shirt and sneakers, checking the mirror, looks great! I’m not out to impress anyone tonight. My phone rings on the bedside table pulling me from my thoughts, must be JP:

JP: We're here. Come down!

JP has the same blue eyes as mine, and Duda's,. To be honest the three of us were very similar physically: blue eyes, dark blond hair, tall. But our personality is very, very different! Duda lightened her hair more, always looking very blonde, but fits her very well with her slender body, she’s always in a good mood. She also is the youngest, at 24 and loves a party. John Pedro, better known as JP is 27 years old and exactly the same height as me: 1.81 also slender like Duda and always very elegant with his fine clothes, well-made beard, trimmed hair and tanned skin. He is always ready for adventure and enjoyment. A womanizer like I said. Always was and always will be! I'm quieter and in my corner, I don't like big parties and I never did, when I was younger, I was just in my room studying music playing on the computer or reading. Today I go to the gym every day to destress myself from everyday problems, physical exercises are great for calming my mind and it's something I can do on my own.

With JP hanging out of the sunroof helping himself to a bottle of champagne yelling in between pulls from the bottle. It’s going to be a long night I thought to myself.

- Come on brother, today is the day to celebrate!

I was still twenty-eight years old, and my last three years weren't very pleasant! I went from hell to purgatory and was now in rehab. He and Richard wanted me to have fun, I can't condemn them, but it wasn't what I wanted. This time of ballads is over, I've done a lot of mistakes, enough!

- Come on Louis, how long has it been since you met another woman?

- What?

- Did you listen to me!

- Damn Richard, I think… maybe two months

- Two months my ass! It does a lot more!

- Okay, since carnival, satisfied?

- Carnival? Have you been going through a dry spell since carnival?– Joe said and I changed the subject.

- And how did you manage to go out today with JP in a limo?

- We went to JP's house and we came with him from there. – Carlos spoke very proudly.

- I didn’t! Duda knows!

- Duda knows everything! – Duda is my younger sister, as I said before, and she’s also Richard's wife  A nosy woman that gets into everything!

- And she agreed??

- She got a tantrum...

- There will be consequences!

- Yup!

- What time are we leaving?

- At four...

- We're not even there and you're already asking about going back?

You know what, let me have fun with my friends! A night to laugh! JP brought about three bottles of champagne into the car and when we arrived at the club a VIP space was reserved with a bucket with more bottles.

We sat on the rounded red leather bench with a small table in front, while downstairs several sweaty bodies danced to the music. A lot of beautiful people!

- Go Louis, get someone!

- I haven't seen anyone interesting yet!

- It's not to find the love of your life in the club! Look at a pair of boobs and go!

- Stimulating Carlos!

- I will! – JP stood up with his glass in his hand snuggling up to a girl who was dancing on the floor, I continued to sit with the guys.

- Aren't you going, Louis?

- No... I'm not in the mood for a skirt today Richard!

- Is there anything I don't know?

I looked at him in alarm, how can the even drunk bastard manage to interpret me like that? I stretched out on the bench, putting a hand to the back of my neck and said:

- No - I lied - Why?

- Well, I want you to tell me exactly what it is!

- Man, I just said it's nothing!

- Scratching your head! You only do this when you're nervous!

- I don't want to talk about it here!

- Tomorrow?

- In my place!

So we continued drinking and talking in our VIP area, without being bothered by the hoochies around.

After a couple of hours I saw. I don't know if it's because of the alcohol already ingested or if she really was there! But I saw them! Ana and Luana! The two were dancing in the middle of the floor to the beat of the music, some guys came over to say something in her ear, I rested my elbows on my knees and bent forward so I could pay attention to the scene, she laughed, but she shook her head with her forefinger up on his nose. The guy still insisted something, so Luana turned to him saying something else and he left. I smiled and took a sip of my drink. This is my flower, full of thorns!

- Did you see anything you liked down there?

- Don't scare me, Richard!

- Who is it? Show me?

- Nobody!

- You were smiling!

- I wasn’t! – I looked at Joe and Carlos who were just confirming, looking at the track trying to see who it could be that attracted my attention. But I leaned back against the seat and drank the rest of the champagne saying:

- You are crazy! I was seeing JP coming to the mine and getting dumped, so I laughed!

- It makes sense! – Joe said!

I want to leave! And I want to go now! It's still two-forty and they won't let me go!

- See that girl over there in the black dress? I'll take it her home! So don't wait for me in the car, kids!

- Oh yes, the Louis that we were waiting all night!

I got up toasting them loudly and got to the girl, talked to her for two minutes and took her to the dance floor. I don't want to meet Ana! I don't want her to see me with a woman, and I also don’t´ want to take the risk of seeing her with another guy.

I went around the club, bought the girl a drink, I don't even know what her name was, and then I lost her too! I left and called a taxi.

In the car my cell phone beeps with the arrival of a message:

Richard: I know you left! Tomorrow we talk!

I read the message and didn't reply. I was going to tell him the truth anyway. At least he didn't stop me from going home! I'll have to talk to him, otherwise I'll go crazy!

I went straight home to take a shower to get rid of that smell of various perfumes and drinks that the club has, I looked in the mirror and could only see someone very fucked up!

Three years ago I managed to get rid of a weed that was killing my life, then I found out that my best friend was dating my sister, so I immersed myself in JP's life running around town to every club possible. I think I needed this time to get my head together!

But just as I've solved my internal problems, putting all the witches to run, an external problem appears to me, a problem with a first and last name: Ana Clara Gusmão.

I got into the cold shower to get my thoughts away from her, after all it's almost three o'clock, I've had too much to drink and I'm sleepy, my brain isn't working right! But what the hell was she doing in São Paulo? She shouldn't be here, she lives so far away! How would she get home, should I go back and check on her?

- Stop being a muggle Louis! Surely she knows how she's going home! She´s no child! She's a grown woman and knows how to get by, if she wants to, she'll even find someone to take her home – I said that out loud in the bathroom.

Shit! That thought only pissed me off!

I rubbed my eyes hard to see if it worked., to get her out of my head! I sat on the bed, still drying my head and remembered how she was dancing carelessly at the club, with her friend Luana, who didn't even care for that John Doe who came to her! I threw the towel on the armchair next to the bed and lay down smiling.

- She's not there to go out with anyone, as I am, just to talk and have a laugh with friends – It was me talking to myself again. And I was still smiling like an idiot. After all, that's what I was! A real idiot!

***

November 23, Sunday.

At eleven in the morning my cell phone starts ringing, who's calling me now?

- Hello...

- Louis, get up, I'm coming over!

- Good morning to you too!

- Good Morning! Get ready! No excuses!

- Ok Richard, I really need to talk to you! But how did you wake up so early?

- As soon as you left I also left!

- I understand, are you coming alone?

- Yes, but Duda will be over later.

- How long do I have to rest before she arrives?

- I think she won’t be there till after the game so you have some time,

- Okay! Do you have the key?

- Of course!

- Of course my ass? The house is mine, you know?

- Go fuck yourself Louis! I’ll be over shortly so get your ass up and get ready.

I awoke without the slightest desire to get up. I dreamed of her all night, dancing inside the club with her warm body next to mine, but every time I would touch her someone would come in front stopping me.

Bath! I need another shower!

So that's it, I'm going to tell Richard! Let's see if he gives me a great idea or a spanking. More likely it's a spanking, and since I really need to see if my head snaps back into place, I don't really care!

Richard arrived just as I was making coffee and yelled from the living room door, which gives a wide view to the kitchen with a counter as a partition:

- Fix me a cup would you?

- You didn't have breakfast, did you?

- Yes, but coffee is coffee!

He sat on one of the benches in front of me and waited, not sure if for the coffee or me to start talking. For now I pretended it was just the coffee he wanted, I finished making it, still with my back to him I took two mugs, filled them and placed them on the counter in front of him, I stood on the other side, for now at a safe distance from him.

- Sugar?

- Please!

He sweetened his coffee, took a sip and continued to look at me with those green eyes that looked more like glass. I don't know what my sister sees in this asshole! I thought about it and smiled as he set the mug down on the counter again.

- What's up? Are you going to tell me the reason for that smile, or not?

- What smile?

- Don’t play dumb with me!

- Regarding that smile, I was here thinking about: what did my sister see in you?

- Douchebag! Okay, and what else do you need to talk to me about?

- So.... It's not too early for that?

- Louis! Fuck!

- Calm down, no need to scream!

He kept looking at me. Drank the rest of his coffee, rested his elbow on the counter with his hand on his chin, tilting his head to one side to continue looking at me in that strange way. He changed his hand position once between gripping his chin and supporting it with clenched fists, I took a deep breath to gather my courage and start talking, opened my mouth but closed it again.

He then rubbed his eyes and rested his chin with both hands clasped in front of him with his elbows on the counter, he blinked a few times and I opened my mouth again to speak, but I didn't say anything...

- Damn Louis! Speak up soon!

- I think I'm liking someone...

- Damn bro, this is great! All this to tell me that?

- Err...

- She knows?

- No! - I replied with apprehensive eyes - And she can't even know!

- Someone I know?

- I think so.

- Explain something to me. What do you mean…. you think you liking her?

- Oh I don't know Richard – I turned my back to him and walked around the counter, towards the pool table I had on the right side. I picked up a pool cue involuntarily and started chalking it. Richard got up and came towards me, taking the box with the balls and place it on the table, just watching me and waiting for me to continue talking. I looked at him who was now facing away from me, arranging the balls on the table, and dropped my arms down, trying to relax my body. – I kind of can't get her out of my head!

- Give me a pool cue! - I passed it to him, who positioned himself in front of the white ball and hit it hard, making me take a little fright, taking me out of my thoughts - Your turn!

I thought it was strange that he stopped asking, I went around the table and when I went to hit the ball he kept talking:

- Are you in love?

- What? – The ball came out all crooked, not hitting anything that was on the table. He grinned then burst into laughter almost pissing himself in the process.

- You can take another shot. – I glared at him who gave me back the ball asking again – But are you?

- No!

- Are you sure?

- I am!

- Then why make a move and see if it's worth it!

- Like?

- Don't make that silly face! How many women have we done this with?

- I can´t!

- Why not?

- This time I just can't do it!

- Who’s this mysterious woman?

I hit the pool cue dropping a ball and looked at him leaning the stick on the floor with one hand and scratching my hair with the other

- So…

- Aren't you going to tell me it's Paula again? If so I'll kill you, kid!

- NO! Geez. Are you crazy?

We both made the sign of the cross and started to laugh.

- So, who?

I missed the next ball and passed it to him. While he took aim I started:

- Yesterday, at the club.

- Hmm...

- I saw her dancing on the floor!

- At that time you got a silly face smiling?

- I didn't look like silly, I just smiled!

- I know... And then you wanted to leave. You should’ve talked to her!

- Not in front of you!

He lowered the pool cue to the ground pointing at me and said:

- Now we’re making head way, Your turn!

- I didn't say anything about that! – I missed the ball – Your turn!

- Damn Louis! You never make mistakes like that!

- I can't talk to her!

- Who is she'?

- Shall we change the subject a bit?

- Will you tell me today?

- I will! You're worse than a teenager!

- Shall we have lunch at your brothers?

- Is he in the 'Insignia' today?

- I don’t know! I'll call him, calm down, let me just finish this game.

He hit the last two balls and sat on the couch to talk to JP. The ‘Insignia’ is a restaurant, basically Italian, but it has everything and JP owns it. He studied abroad for a while and when he came back he thought he was going to have a restaurant, his words: “Food always sells”.

It's still true! He managed to make the restaurant look like a typical Italian village full of life, plants everywhere and a decor that makes anyone wish travel to Europe, I might even be a little poetic, but it's true! He is a wine specialist, who in addition to being a Sommelier is also a winemaker. And he also runs the restaurant tooth and nail, he's doing a great job! Despite his reputation as a womanizer. He’s also very responsible!

- Come on Louis, let’s go! He will be there until four today!

- Did he mention what’s on the menu for today?

- Does he ever say?

- Fucking brat!

- I'll be quiet for the whole lunch, and let you do the talking

- I really don't want to talk around JP! Not even Duda, are you listening to me?

- Hey, you haven’t  even told me and you're already accusing me?

- She's not supposed to know that we even had a conversation about it! Much less that there is a person!

We had lunch and got back in less than an hour, JP was there, but he hardly paid any attention to us, thank goodness! Still in the car, Richard takes my cell phone to change the music and says:

- Louis?

- Yes...

- How can you like this band?

- RPM? Damn Richard, we played their songs in college!

- Yeah, but I only played because I helped with the girls!

- I like it! But don't worry because it's in shuffle mode and it won't play the full album!

He changed songs anyway and kept my cell phone in his hand, looking at it.

- Do you already have the phone of girl?

- I do!

- Do I know her?

- I don't know if you know, you must know who she is! - I said shrugging my shoulders.

- Is she from the office?

I stopped the car in front of the iron gate that led to my house and waited for it to open. He was looking at me and holding the phone. With both hands gripping the steering wheel, I looked at him, decided to count, so he continued:

- And it's not Paula! For God's sake huh Louis!

- I already told you it's not Paula!

I drove through the streets of the condominium until I arrived at my house, put the car inside and closed the private garage behind us. We made the walk up up the stairs adjacent to the garage in silence, as we reached the top Richards phone rang.

“Hello / What’s up Joe / Who? / Serious..."

Then he looks at me with a strange face, still with his cell phone to his ear and closes the kitchen door behind him, goes to the fridge, gets a beer and keeps talking on the phone:

“Hmm... / I'm at Louis's house, can you talk / The two of you? / And you call to say that? / Okay / See you tomorrow"

- Do you want a beer?

- I do!  I picked up the television remote and started browsing the sports channels to find which one my team was going to play on. He sat next to me, putting a beer in my hand and said:

- It was Joe...

- Did they stay late yesterday?

- Until the agreed time, then they returned in the limo to JP's house to pick up the cars.

- And what did he want?

- Just to let you know that he saw Luana and Ana there yesterday.

- Oh yes? – I kept looking at the television – And?

- Lucas too, he saw them there on the dance floor.

- Serious?

- He called me about the bet...

I turned to him, eyes wide open and my heart in my mouth. It began to beat fast and I didn't even know the rest of the story yet.. Had someone won the fucking bet? I held the bottle tightly between my fingers and took a big swig of beer before asking,

- From the bet?

- Yeah, remember? That they want to take Ana, your employee, to bed and stuff...

- I know what the fuck the bet is! And so? – I said through gritted teeth.

He rested an arm on the back of the sofa and lifted a bent leg over the sofa, turning his whole body towards me, took a sip of his beer and laughed saying:

- Louis, you are a son of a bitch!

- What did I do?

- The mysterious woman is Ana, isn’t she?